I’ve always been a huge fan of folk art because it is typically very unique and affordable. This piece is a great example of wacky religious stuff, which is part of the reason why I want it.
These are all kind of odd… This one shows a girl being attacked by octopi. The text on the up left supposedly translates to “I saw a ship coming and I went swiming to wave to the handsome sailors, but suddenly I felt caught and I saw that an octopus had me grabbed by the feet with its tentacles and I saw that other one came closer with bad intentions, I invoked the Virgin of Guadalupe and thanks to her the octopus left me free because he went to met to the other octopus, love at first sight I suppose, and I returned to the beach the most quick that I could..”
It’s painted on tin that is about the size of a sheet of paper. Oh, and if you aren’t familiar retablos, they are basically religious paintings made to thank saints. Ex-voto items are items that were given as a fullfillment of a vow.
Back to the important stuff. It is available on ebay. If you were cool, you’d buy this. If you were awesome you’d buy this for me. If you dig the retablos but not so much a fan of octopi, maybe just check out other retablos available on ebay.
If I was the supreme creator of the universe, I imagine I’d be rather bored. How many silly animals can you make before it gets old? The real question would be what the hell would you do to fill all that time. I’d probably just start crushing all creation with a giant fist or bust out the pillar of flames.
I found a religion-related game that might help you if you are bored and/or trying to procrastinate. Don’t expect to get infinite entertainment out of it though. I’m guessing you might find it amusing for one to five minutes.
It’s a lovely little flash game called God’s Playing Field. The premise is that you’ve stepped into heaven to have a chat with the old man and you bore the shit out of him apparently because he takes a nap. While he is sleeping, you step over to his G-Machine and pass a little time telling folks on Earth that their time is up. This game has 7+ million plays and has a positive rating. If you are looking for silly blasphemy, you’ll probably enjoy it for the couple of minutes. Game play is very limited (pick a weapon and click the mouse repeatedly) so I give it a “meh out of 10″ (see rating scale).
The effeminate Jesus man has a lot of songs/videos posted on youtube. Most of them are not in english, which is a shame.
My two favorite english language releases of his are as follows:
I’m not sure if I understand this song, but the video is great. A weird guy wearing lipstick who likens himself to Jesus while his new age friends all jump around and play with soap suds.
Everyone is Jesus. What else can you say?
This guy is one of the ugliest women I’ve seen in a music video but you can’t argue with his message (especially since I can’t figure it out).
In Texas a former middle school math teacher was arrested for sending a 14 year-old boy topless photos of herself. She supposedly met him at the church where is also a Sunday school teacher. 27 year-old Victoria Ann Chacon gave the boy a cell phone that included the photos of her naughty bits and raunchy love letters that his parents didn’t like too much.
Most guys high five each other just hearing a story like this. Good for him, right? Wrong. Did you see that ugly toad? I understand not every kid is going to land a Debra LaFave or a Pamela Rogers Turner. I understand that Sunday schools offer limited choices in ladies who want to sex up the kids. Take what you can get, right? Still, that lady is gross.
Watch for the guy in red. He is out of control. Full on dive into the police at 10 seconds. Sucker punches another clergy member in the face at second 16. Nice. I’m pretty sure with all the ripped robes the local Jo-Ann Fabric is making out like a bandit.
If church was like this I’m pretty sure I’d wake up a little bit earlier on Sundays. It reminds me of this lovely painting I saw on ebay of Jesus puking in an alley because he is offended by the sight of a mob of children attacking a homeless person. If you are wondering what to get me for Christmas, search no more…
God Bless Ebay and all the kookie artsy people who post $750 paintings of Jesus vomiting.
